Bangalore Bulletin Board- 2

Tradition and traffic…


One more Diwali gone by… Sigh… It’s one festival you cannot ‘not’ enjoy… I mean, who can resist a home lit up like a lantern, heavenly aromas, that tease your palate, emanating from the kitchen , the Puja room looking like it took a flower shower, the tall brass lamps looking like they just took a nice long sparkling and shiny bath, your mom looking like she is the happiest person on earth with her family all together on that one day (Despite the fact that she has been sweating it out in the kitchen from the morning and also the fact that, for dad, she is a one stop shop for anything he is not able to find in the house…), your dad bossing around everyone to get the Puja items ready (While pretending to be working himself, though all he does is order people around, hmmpf, a proper manager…), your younger sister going around the house complaining how she is so overworked because she is the youngest (Though that’s all she probably does, crib, I mean… I only saw her shuttling between rooms and not do anything specific…), your cream butterball sitting in a convenient corner (From where he can observe everyone and still doze between all the excitement…) in a very peaceful manner, oblivious to all the hungama going on around him, and barking once in a while when he feels he is forgotten. Didn’t I tell you, it will earn you a place straight in hell if you dare to enter our place and not smother Duke with hugs and kisses and tummy rubs… he is spoilt, we know it but its too late to do anything about it now, so if you ever come home, you know what to do! So, yeah, Diwali is a combination of all those people and sights and sounds and smells and sentiments; all those laughs and chuckles and jeers and shouts and melody; all those mad rushes between rooms and in and out of the Puja room and between your home and the market place… The feeling of being home for the festivals settles over you towards the evening when you realize you did all the things you do each year, without any change in pattern, despite all your claims of trying to be more organized the next year (Of course its not your problem that the Puja got advanced because Ajji, our maternal granny, suddenly recalculated the muhurat to discover that it has to be done the same evening and not the next morning J Hahahahaha, of course you need to have someone to blame for your hurry burry…)… But I guess each family has a particular tradition and feel they attach to each of the important festivals and events in their lives. Diwali is one of the most important festivals for us and you can see it in all the preparations and anticipation that goes into it. We love being home that one day, being blasted by dad for our inefficient work, being consoled by mom with a ‘You know your dad, na…’, fighting with my sis on who was supposed to do a particular (And of course, incomplete) chore, rubbing Dukie’s ears or tummy every time we pass him by, stealing bites of the yummy stuff ma spends time preparing for us, and getting all decked up and feeling all traditional and nice and pretty when you finally are ready for the Puja and entertaining the guests that come over to share your happiness and laughter… And then there are the crackers of course. We had stopped bursting crackers the year we got Duke into our home but it was only a couple of years earlier that ma and pa found him jumping around and playing with the flower pots crackers and the zameen chakras and decided that those two fireworks can be allowed into our celebrations. So each year we now have sparklers, flower pots and chakras adding sparkle (And pollution, I know, but in our defense, we just burn a pack of each…) to our celebrations…



Well, I have told you all about the Diwali day but I didn’t tell you about how we actually made it to my parents place in Hyderabad, did I? Hmmm, now that is something I have to have to tell you guys, for it was one time that I was part of a historic moment. Yeah, you heard me right, it was a historic moment alright… My sis and I were caught up in one of the worst traffic jams in the history of Bangalore… And what brought on this Jam? For a change it wasn’t the vehicles (Well, not entirely…), it was due to the strike the passengers of KSTRC went on to protest the lack of buses (or driver or even conductor in some cases) on routes where the passengers had pre- booked, confirmed tickets. Ok, let me start right at the beginning. My sis and I had to catch a Hyd bound bus from Bangalore at 7 30 PM and left home a couple of hrs early to beat the traffic (If only we had known :/) and reached majestic by 6 PM. Well, an hour and a half is not that bad when you have a nice Nokia express music cell phone (I’m not advertising any brands! Just really proud of my new and the hippest ever cell phone I have owned…) and a chatterbox of a sis… You know what, that is the point, one and a half an hour of a wait with these two facilities is not bad, but three hours (Yeah, our bus actually came in only by 9 PM, efficient…) is quite killing. After a while you really get sick of the songs, the chatter and just start getting plain sulky… And then you find out that your sis has booked a bus that starts at Mysore and goes on to Hyd via Bangalore (Of all the direct buses available, she finds the only stop- over route bus and books two tickets on them :/ Ok, to her credit, she did offer to book tickets when I was lazing, so can’t really blame her for my lethargy…). You need to stand with all the luggage (The Hyd bus platforms are to one side and do not have sufficient seating area, of course right? Why would things be easy for us??? Hmmpf…) and keep moving to vacant platforms as and when the parked buses either move out or new ones occupy the vacant ones you are standing in. And to top it all, you have bugged all the KSRTC officials, standing there for people’s assistance, about when your bus is expected to come at least a hundred times that you are now scared to approach them again (Well, you don’t want to get yelled at in front of a zillion people, do you???) and just end up spotting a couple of guys that have enquired about the same bus and just tail them (It was hilarious to watch my sis follow around this guy wearing a yellow t- shirt! She would panic the minute she would lose sight of him, and give a big sigh of relief every time she spotted him again J). Then finally at 9 PM, our bus’s arrival is announced and we trudge towards the outside of the bus stand where the bus has parked itself. Boy, are you happy with the sight of the dirty, delayed bus or what??? Oh yeah, you are… But the joy is extremely short lived. The reason? A haunted seat :/ My sis was very clear that she wanted the window seat so I got stuck with the aisle seat. The seat was already in a reclined position and I sat down quite comfortably in it. After a few seconds I used some colorful language (In my mind of course!) for the guy sitting behind me as he was pushing my seat upright with his knee. I, very deliberately, pushed my seat back again only to be pushed forward again. I am an extremely non- confrontational person (Read wimp) and plucked up enough courage to give this guy a piece of my mind. It was only when I got up from my seat that I saw that the seat behind me was vacant. The damn seat was moving of its own accord (Seriously, why me?!?!?!?). And the best (Or rather the worst) part of it was that the chair would stay pushed back if I didn’t sit in it and move start pushing me forward only when I sat in it. I got my sis to sit in it check if it hated just me or everyone in this world. Apparently it did hate everyone, it pushed her forward too (Hahaha, I was almost relieved it wasn’t just me…). So then after a small argument with the conductor, who refused to acknowledge the fact that I was talking to him, my sis went and sat in an empty seat up ahead (There were two seats empty as the guys who had booked those two seats had left for home with the belief that the bus would not run that day…) and gave me her window seat. The bus started at 10 PM, an hour after we had boarded, and I dozed off almost immediately. I vaguely remember crawling through unbelievably thick traffic, a lot of angry drivers honking at each other and any unlucky pedestrian that crossed their way, some raised voices inside our own bus before I was woken up by my sis at around 12 30 AM, two and a half hours after we had left majestic. The conductor had taken on additional passengers and there was a heavy set man sitting next to my sis. She got uncomfortable and asked him to take my seat while I moved next to her. We completed the swap, luggage et all, and before closing our eyes again just happened to throw a glance outside the window. We were in a place quite familiar to us and we spent approximately 5 seconds trying to figure out exactly where we were before, tatadaaaaaaaaaaaa, we realized with unrestrained horror that we were back in majestic. Seriously?!?!?!?!? What had happened in those 2- 3 hours that we were blissfully unaware of our surroundings as we dozed? Apparently, not much :/ Yeah, the bus did a full circuit of majestic and landed straight back in the bus station to pick up a couple of additional passengers. Three hours of bladder control wasted :/ And when travelling in a bus, it almost feels like a huge monetary loss!!! So, it was actually 1 AM before we started for Hyd. Hmmpf.

The rest of the journey was ok, just ok. Well, I do have the gift of being able to sleep through any journey and that saved me on this trip as well. The only problem was that my throat was parched and my dehydrated body was screaming for water. I fooled my body with a few measly sips of water and settled back to sleep. We reached Hyd at around 12 30 PM the next day and got roasted in the heat there (Did someone say there were floods in Andhra? Where did all the clouds and water go?) for half an hour before we were picked up by our dad (Happily seated in an air conditioned vehicle and smiling at us…). Our place is on the outskirts of city and it was another hour or two before we beat the traffic and made it home at around 2 30 PM. And then the mad Puja rush I described earlier started when dad said he had advanced the Puja to the same evening based on the inputs provided by our Ajji…

Well, the rest of our stay was really pleasant and memorable as well (Luckily the travel back wasn’t eventful; except for the fact that we rode over the new fly- over in Hyd, the 11 KM one, yippee!). While I don’t ever want to suffer through another journey like the one we experienced on our way to Hyd, it does seem so funny and adventurous in hind- sight (I’m sure my views would be quite different if my sturdy bladder had had other plans!)… Having my sis by my side definitely made it so much more memorable and, in a way, enjoyable…

So lesson learnt (Don’t worry, there wont be a lesson end of every bulletin!) is that there is happiness in almost everything around you. You just need the right people and the right outlook to see through it!


Cheers
Megha Havaldar

Bangalore Bulletin Board- 1

Hey People!

Hmmm, so what happens when you return offshore after 14 months at onsite? A lot actually! Only you don’t realize it until it actually hits you… The preparations for your return all seem in place and sound pretty cool. You talk to family, friends back in India, prepare them for your return so they are all waiting for you with open arms and teary eyes… You tell people at onsite about how you realize that adjusting back is going to be tough and how you are mentally prepared for it… You decide not to throw any ‘Phoren- return’ tantrums so it’s easier for you to fit right back in. And so on and so forth…. And then, WHAM! You are offshore and you know what??? All the gyan you gave people about being prepared, ha, doesn’t help you one bit. Ok, you knew it would be tough, but actually experiencing it is a different ball game altogether. But exactly what is it that gets to you??? Well, try the following:

1. Most of your friends have moved on (Read: married or out of the city itself…)

2. You are suddenly part of the ‘Crowd’ again and feel like you have no personal space

3. The traffic is murderous and scary (No more smiling at motorists and walking across roads; here, they would gladly run you over to save a second!)

4. The dogs love barking between 1 and 4 AM (The first time in my life I actually felt like giving one swift kick to any dog- Actually only to that stupid black and white dog that stays right outside my window…)

5. You can’t just eat any place because you are suddenly acutely aware of the hygiene conditions under which the food is prepared and served

6. You can’t really talk to people about how you miss the place you just left for the fear of hurting them (My mom would kill me with an emotional drama if she finds out that I still miss being in the US of A!)

7. You again are whistled at or called something so ‘nice’ on the roads by perfect and absolute strangers that you seriously consider going to the nearest ‘Health and Glow’ to buy a can of pepper spray (I really think India houses all the perverts of this world, well, at least 99% of them…)

8. People expect you to have changed for the better (My hair was quite a disappointment for my family and friends. They wanted to know why I ‘did’ that to my hair. I was very clear in explaining to them that it ‘happened’ to my hair, there was absolutely no effort from my side to ‘do’ it…. Seriously people, give me a break…). Oh, and yeah, my tan was also the topic of discussion. My granny actually asked me if I had lied about the snow (“How can someone get dark in a place where it snows?”- Ajji, I do hope you understand that I returned after enjoying two months of summer, everyday of which I was out roaming around in a city that is in the northern hemisphere and attracts a lot of UVA and UVB rays!)

9. People everywhere think you have saved at least Rs. 20 lakhs and can ‘of course’ spend at least a couple of thousands treating them (I haven’t even had a full decent conversation with some of these people, ever!). Any chik- chik you do about money is brushed aside with a “You don’t talk about it. You just came back from the US.” (Yeah sweetie, I saved enough not to work for the rest of my life and also to support the next three generations of my clan…).

You know, I could possibly just go on about this. But it suddenly hit me that all through this crib session, I have also been smiling about the happy things that you experience when you get back. Well, try the following:

1. The first instant at the airport where you are craning to catch the first glimpse (Without specs, mind you!) of your parents through the crowds. The moment when you actually spot them smiling through their moist eyes. The second you feel so overwhelmed that you see clearly again (When you are shortsighted, and your eyes tear up, they act as natural lenses and with the right amount of water in your eyes, you can see perfectly well! Ha, I know the brains that are scientifically inclined would've understood this, not sure about the others!). The second you are in the arms of your parents again, hugging them so hard that you feel like never letting go again. The crazy moment when all of you are crying and laughing at the same time, trying to put a thousand hugs and smiles into that one moment, sigh… That is one moment that made me appreciate my parents more than ever…

2. The minute you walk in the door at home and a ball of cream fur rushes at you and makes you feel as welcome as you ever would feel. The minute that pig he wants to play with you and grabs the nice black jacket you are carrying and runs away with it, hoping you will chase after him (Dog drool leaves a silvery sheen over clothes after it dries, so you can imagine what happened to my black jacket- it went straight to laundry after my baby had gotten bored of chewing it…) and when you start opening your bags, a fat eager piggy sits next to you, wagging his tail, knowing that you have brought him something (That’s like a house rule, you can’t get in unless you are carrying something nice for Dukie). And the best moment is when the fat piggy realizes that all you have brought for him is a leash (It, of course, doesn’t matter that it is a US made, retractable, highly recommended one…) and growls at you when you try to hook it to his collar and hides under the bed :) :) :) Oh, how I would’ve loved to capture his dirty look and the escape thereafter on my camera… That was my ‘badlaa’ for the drool he deposited on my jacket! Ha, talk of getting even, hee hee hee!!!

3. The change in schedule that your dad makes so he can see you more often. Like coming home for lunch, which he never did earlier, and trying to get home by 6 everyday (His ‘official’ work timing is 7 AM to 2 PM, but he ends up working 7 AM to 8 PM) and talk to me about all the things we missed while I was away.

4. The sudden increase in the number of dishes your mom prepares (And the complaints from Dad that she does this only when ‘her’ kids are home and never just for him!) and the happy expression with which she takes on this additional cooking and baking work…

5. The happiness with which they show you off to their friends and colleagues (You’d think I am the only girl who has ever travelled to the US for work!) and to see the indulgent smiles of their friends as they realize it is the parental love and pride that is making them project their daughter as the best, and in some cases, just laugh out, when they see my uncomfortable fidgeting…

6. The smiles that spread across everyone’s faces when they see what the big blue suitcase has carried for them…

7. The phone calls that you place to your friends announcing that you are now back in town and can’t wait to meet them and talk about all the things that you have saved for the time when you actually meet up…

8. Finding all your favorite eating joints and shopping places are still intact and waiting for you to splurge! Looking at the familiar shopkeepers faces and giving them big smiles of happiness while they just wonder what’s wrong with the mad girl standing in front of them and grinning ear to ear for no apparent reason (They do meet hundreds of people each day, but for you, they are still so recognizable and do count among the faces you have been waiting to see again, even if they do not recognize you…).

9. The feeling of being home on the day you witness the first heavy rains in Bangalore (It had rained every first day that I had come to Bangalore as a kid and even on the first day that I was dropped off here for college…) and huddling close and remembering why all of this is so important to you. The feeling that while you may have enjoyed the facilities and comfort that an alien country had to offer you, you can never stay away from your own country and not miss it. You may be able to make a statement that India is important to you only because of the people it keeps safe for you, but that is not entirely true. It is also important to you because you were born here, raised here, most of the happy and sad memories worth mentioning were created here, it is the place you will bring up your children, your family, and also the place you will finally be put to rest. A comfortable life and relative freedom can never compare with the deep bond which is formed at the time of your birth. You may decide and love to stay away for a few years, but then you are bound to return to your homeland, mentally and in the end, physically as well…

Wow! I never knew I felt so strongly about a few of these things… Introspection really brings out things that you usually would not look at in your routine life… Hmmm, I do know that while some of you may have read through this without yawing, there would also be a few of you that would probably have missed a few lines when you dozed off halfway through this bulletin. So let me get back to my everyday report that won’t really bore you as much…

I am now cooking for and taking care of my sis. She doesn’t really offer to help out of the fear that I may take up her offer at face value, she doesn’t do the dishes, she likes to eat a variety of things and does not like eating the same dish being cooked consecutive days, loves being pampered and still pulls my leg about how chik- chik I am and in some cases how I am so much worse than mamma (That’s when I force her to have a glass of milk every morning…). And to think that I had thought taking care of people is something I would have to do only after my marriage , but I do adore her so much and, being my baby, I love pampering her!

So, I am back to my life that I had put on suspension for a year while I lived out a life of absolute abandon and the perfect ‘Bachelorette’ life that any girl could ever wish for… But I guess, after the initial adjustment issues, I'm doing just fine and love being back with my own people, my loved ones. So, here's where I leave you guys, but stick on with me and you will receive blogs from around the world (You didnt think I named my blog 'Bulletins Boards from around the world' for nothing, did you???). I do intend to see the world (Some parts of it at least...) and stay with me so you can be a part of it too! Thank you for visiting this page...

Thanks and regards

Megha